Dead at 25, Buried at 80

Recently a mentor at work told a friend of mine,
"Most men die at twenty-five, but are buried at eighty."

I turn twenty-five this year... and I see exactly what he means.
It's being slowly jaded by the futility of most days.
It's about losing your passions, dreams, and ideals.
It's the realization that life isn't more than surviving today.
It's becoming a slave to the daily grind.
It's seeing most of your work being ultimately meaningless.

This is occurring in all aspects of my life...
At work, most of my efforts, designs, creations are rendered useless be business politics, that I am losing the incentive to work hard and come up with new ideas.
In my personal life, large amount of time devoted to work and travel and living in a new city, it is insanely difficult to meet new people and make real relationships, that it's easier to be tired at the end of the day to shut myself in.
Even church, I am finding that it is insanely difficult to find a legit church with good teaching and a solid community of people that really love God and others, not just a social club, that it's easier to listen to podcasts and read blogs.

Are my passions, my dreams, and my ideals even possible?

Like a growing, darkening cloud building to a violent thunderstorm that is far off but will undoubtedly roll towards you, there is a sense of settling for the present because the present is known. There are no options other than hunkering down, waiting out the storm, and hoping that it will pass yet knowing that it never will.

I wake up tomorrow, and what's next?

Reminds me of Psalm 22.
My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?

Perhaps Fredrick Buechner said it best:
"We all want to be certain [that God exists], we all want proof, but the kind of proof we tend to want-scientifically or philosophically demonstrable proof that would silence all doubts once and for all-would not in the long run, I think, answer the fearful depths of our need at all. For what we need to know, of course, is not just that God exists, not just that beyond the steely brightness of the stars there is a cosmic intelligence of some kind that keeps the whole show going, but that there is a God right here in the thick of our day-by-day lives who may not be writing messages about himself in the stars but who in one way or another is trying to get messages through our blindness as we move around down here knee-deep in the fragrant muck and misery and marvel of the world. It is not objective proof of God’s existence that we want but, whether we use religious language for it or not, the experience of God’s presence. That is the miracle that we are really after. And that is also, I think, the miracle that we really get."

It's not objective proof that we want that God exists or that Jesus really is the redeeming Messiah.
No.
What we really want...
What I really want...
...is proof that God is right here, that Jesus' redemption is right here in the thick of the day-to-day, in the fragrant muck and misery and marvel of life.

I am crying out to see this.

To the Jews of the first century, their word for faith was chutzpah.
Spunk. Persistence. Balls.

We see this all. over. the bible.

Abraham said to God, "Lord, what can you give me? I am dying childless, since you have given me no offspring! Therefore, my steward will be my heir." After God had promised him that his offspring would be like the dust of the earth. Had he not trusted God? Genesis 15

Moses said to God, "Show me your glory!" After the ten plagues, after the Red Sea, after the first water from a rock, after they got to Mt. Sinai, even as Moses is standing on the mountain that is burning like a furnace. Has he not seen God's glory? Exodus 33:18

The gentile woman (oh the cultural norms that she is breaking) desperate for her daughter to be healed, confronted Jesus even after he turned her away saying, "even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from the master's table." Matthew 15:21-28

Paul got taken outside the city, dropped of a rock wall and stoned. He got up, dusted himself off, and walked back into the city. Acts 14

In Revelation, the saints ask God, "How long will it be before you judge the people on the earth and gain vengeance for our blood?" Revelation 6:10
Jesus on the cross screams, "MY GOD, MY GOD, WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME???"
Matthew 27:46 Mark 15:34


Which harkens back to Psalm 22.
My God, my God why do you forsake me? ...yet still, I will praise you. I tell your name, and all the ends of the earth will remember and turn to you.

Seriously, go read it.

It is a poem written by a man struggling with the thick of the day-to-day wading through the fragrant muck and misery and marvel of life.


Faith isn't belief in something. It's persistent certainty.

Jesus talks of this faith, this chutzpah, moving mountains.
Jesus tells parables
   of a man standing at the door, in the middle of the night, hungry
   of a widow seeking justice

These stories are filled with great men and women throughout history who had the balls to confront God. The balls and the persistent certainty proclaim that God redeems.


Here I stand about to be twenty-five, death crouching at my door,
Will I settle with the thought that, "Well, this is they way life really is."?
Will I stand up and fight for the passion, the dreams, the ideals?
Will I cave into the system to make sure that my wallet is padded?
Will I see and hear the cries of those in need and do something?

When I wake up tomorrow,
   what will I see?
   what will I hear?
   will I sit in comfort slowly dying?
   will I take a risk to learn something new?


Jesus said, "Lech acharai" which translates to, "Come, follow me."
It is more literally translated, "Walk after me."

May we, walk after Jesus.